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Have you ever wondered during or after sex, "Is that all that?"

Have you ever felt dissatisfied during sex because your partner came before you even started?

Have you ever wished to be deeply moved while at the same time fearing to open up and be vulnerable?

Have you ever experienced a moment of ecstasy in love; and afterwards you didn't remember how that happened?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, then you intuitively feel the value of peak intercourse experiences: those special moments, right before or during orgasm, when you leave behind the limitations of your personal problems and prejudices.

Suddenly you float, you feel very much alive, filled with light and pleasure; you feel at home in a moment that seems to last forever, in a space that fills you with awe.

It is these rare, intense and often unexpected experiences that generate new energy and stimulate feelings of closeness and gratitude between you and your partner.

As a Spiritual and Personal Life coach I teach people how they can experience their sexuality more richly and with more depth

Because we know that such moments are possible, we secretly hope every time we have sex that something like this will happen again. We cherish the image of that deeply fulfilling and joyful embrace. In that image, the heart's delight, the meeting of the spirits and the mutual recognition of spiritual relationship are contained in the sizzling pleasure of the body. When you relax in it, your body knows exactly what to do. You don't have to think about that. You forget everything around you and are completely absorbed in it. Time stands still, or goes very fast, which is pure trance.

The touch of your loved one can send you waves of pleasure right down to your toes. In the arms of someone you love, you feel as if you are drifting away from yourself and time. You gently and naturally slide into a state of relaxed awareness, comparable to that of meditation.

Such peak experiences leave unforgettable memories, and most of us deeply yearn to regain this ecstatic feeling of 'flowing'. We usually fail because we lack the cultural context to understand it and don't have the personal skills to develop it. It is an experience of the whole body, the whole being. The path of higher sex helps the body to free itself from tension, the heart to trust and open, and the mind to develop skills such as visualization, imagination and meditation. When this integration has taken place, you are ready for a new, higher-quality sexual experience, in which physical pleasure becomes a pleasure for the heart and an ecstasy for the mind.

Sexuality is not something you do in your spare time or part-time. It's a way of life.

Tantra teaches you how to hold the energetic charge that spreads the erotic arousal - usually concentrated in the genitals - throughout the body. This is done by means of very subtle channels, which can be compared to the meridians in acupuncture. When that energy reaches the heart and head, a whole range of peak experiences are at your disposal. The orgasm is experienced as ecstasy, you feel the pleasure in all your pores, your heart dances with joy, you are satisfied and full of peace and your energy reaches beyond the boundaries of your body. This experience, as many people believe, is not beyond the reach of us 'ordinary' people. Ecstasy is as natural as sleeping and breathing. It's our birthright. We are born ecstatic. The world is one great wonder. We are not separate, but intuitively and deeply connected to everything around us. Gradually we lose this sense of unity as we adapt to culturally determined factors in our environment and thus separate ourselves from the fullness of life. Men often think that ejaculating causes the pleasure, but that is not the case, just before you ejaculate you come to that ecstasy but after ejaculating a man stops immediately and it is gone, that feeling, with tantra you learn to hold and hold that feeling.

According to a psychiatrist who has extensively studied the phenomenon of ecstasy, "the child gives up his capacity for ecstasy in order to adapt to this world." We simply forget.

By emphasizing ecstasy, higher sex distances itself from the so-called sexual revolution of the 1960s. That revolution aimed to make sexuality more accessible and rebelled against the Puritan attitude, which approved sex only within marriage. Instead, sex was freely experimented with just for the sake of sex itself. The sexual revolution made more people feel more free to engage in multiple sexual relationships with multiple partners in multiple ways. Thousands of books and articles prescribed us to have more, more intense and longer-lasting orgasms with different partners.

Many people have succeeded, but this greater accessibility, as psychologists and sociologists have shown, has not produced long-term physical or emotional satisfaction. Somehow 'having' sex seems like 'having' sex

The ego wants to use sex as a means of relaxation, for pleasure, or to feel attractive to the other, but that is how attention is diverted from our true sexual potential.

Nowadays sex is no longer about accessibility, but about change. It is no longer just 'just' an enjoyable snack; we want to rediscover our ecstatic self in love. We need to revitalize sex in order to live out our potential to the fullest. Erotic bliss cannot be discovered by separating sex from other high goals and seeing it only as relaxation. We need to elevate sexual ecstasy as a way to reach higher stages of consciousness and thus deepen intimacy with our loved ones.

Tantra is ecstasy , we have to learn it again because we just learned it wrong. Do it for your partner, but above all do it for yourself. Learn to love but first of all love yourself.


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